Rango (2011)

Director: Gore Verbinski

Writer: John Logan

Starring: Johnny Depp, Isla Fisher, Timothy Olyphant

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1192628/

 I was not looking forward to seeing this when I first saw the trailer. I'm just sick of Johnny Depp doing kid's films. I want to see something different. I lucked out with this one... it's one of those cartoons you can take the kids too, but it's really aimed for the adults.

 Johnny Depp plays Rango, a pet chameleon that gets tossed out onto the highway when the owners have a near accident. That then sends him on a journey through the desert to the town of Dirt. Here he becomes the Sherriff, meets a girl, has some adventures and eventually finds himself. Fun stuff really.

 A lot of kooky characters, a lot you will recognize who they were modeled after. Coolest part is the little tribute to Hunter S. Thompson! Timothy Olyphant plays Rango's spirit guide. The Man With No Name, totally modeled after Clint Eastwood's character from the old spaghetti westerns.

Verdict: * * *

- Xtoph

Take Me Home Tonight (2011)

Director: Michael Dowse

Writers: Jackie Filgo, Jeff Filgo

Starring: Topher Grace, Anna Faris, Dan Fogler

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0810922/

 Second movie I saw was 'Take Me Home Tonight', the new Topher Grace film. Not really sure how he made if from television to feature films since he's the same in everything he does.

 Topher Grace is a loser who has done nothing with his life and works at the local video store. He has had a crush on a chick out of his league all through school. She come to the store and he lies to act like he's successful now that they are out of high school. She invites him to a party. He calls his buddy who gets fired from his job. They steal a car and snort some coke and party. **Spoiler Alert** An hour and a half later Topher Grace grows some balls and gets the girl.

 This should have had some nostalgia or something, but I felt nothing. There were a few laughs and some tit's once or twice. Nothing to write home about. I kinda have a thing for Anna Faris though... so it was cool seeing her play a chick that was only a little whorish instead of completely whorish like usual. There is really nothing redeeming about this film.

Verdict: * *

- Xtoph

Just Go With It (2011)

Director: Dennis Dugan

Writers: Allan Loeb, Timothy Dowling

Starring: Adam Sandler, Jennifer Aniston, Brooklyn Decker

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1564367/

 Just got off the road and back in Oklahoma, where I can actually find myself in a theater. I got back here and had no clue what any of the movies out were about. It's been so long since I've been in a theater that I haven't seen a preview for one of them. I guess that's what happens when you live on the road and crash places with no television. I tell ya though... I don't feel as though I was missing anything. These movies kept me half-assed entertained for a couple hours, but nothing stuck with me. There was no style or substance. I'll still give you the run down though, I watched 'em... so I might as well give ya a head's up to what it's all about.

 First flick I saw was the new Adam Sandler vehicle 'Just Go With It', I popped into my old theater and while waiting around one of the kids asked me if I wanted to see that one. It's about what you would expect from Adam Sandler. Tired jokes and absurd situations that you completely forget about once you leave the theater.

 Adam Sandler plays a schmuck named Danny. He has a huge honker and a slut for a girlfriend. His wedding day he overhears her talking about her sexcapades  and heads to the bar. Finds out his sob story can get him laid by hot women, keeps the ring and whores himself out for the next decade. During this time he's become a plastic surgeon and got his nose fixed. He meets this babe Palmer (Brooklyn Decker) and thinks he loves her, so he piles li upon lie upon lie... Gets himself a fake family and fake ex-wife, his secretary Jennifer Aniston, and heads off on a Hawaiian vacation with his new girl and fake family. Hijinks ensue and... you guessed it... he falls for Jennifer Aniston. Never saw it coming, did ya?

 It's filled with the same basic humor you come to expect from Sandler film. Nothing new here and leaves you wondering when this horse will die.

Verdict: * *

- Xtoph

a/k/a Tommy Chong (2006)

Director: Josh Gilbert

Writer: Josh Gilbert

Starring: Tommy Chong, Shelby Chong, Paris Chong, Cheech Marin, Lou Adler & Raven Blast

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0478090/

 As ridiculous as it sounds, back in 2003, Tommy Chong of the comedy duo Cheech & Chong was arrested and sentenced to nine months in federal prison for selling bongs on the internet. This documentary tells the story as well as about Tommy's life. With interviews with Tommy, his family, celebrities, politicians and more as well as news and television clips, clips from his films and his stand-up comedy.

 This is a pretty good little film. Entertaining, hell... when is Tommy Chong not entertaining? It also shows how "half-baked" our government can be. Fan of Tommy or not this is worth checking out.

 Stick around after the credits for a great bit where Cheech and Tommy both talk about the creation of one of their most famous bits, "Dave's Not Here".

Verdict: * * *

- Xtoph

Transylvania Twist - DVD - Angled Doors Reviews

 An 80's classic. If you liked films like Transylvania 6-500 or My Best Friend Is A Vampire then you'll dig this movie. Tongue in cheek from the start with lots of nods to classic horror and pop culture in general. Horror fanatics will enjoy Angus Scrimm's small role. Plus this dvd has scenes that were cut from the original video release.

- Xtoph

Semi-Pro: Unrated - DVD - Angled Doors Review

 Another Will Ferrell vehicle. Wasn't the best, but like any Will Ferrell movie it's still a lot of fun. In this one he is some disco one hit wonder that bought a basketball team with his royalties. He's the teams owner/coach/team-member. The team is making no money at all, they are fixing to have to shut down. The NBA is going to pick up a couple of the minor league teams, but Jackie (Will Ferrell) has to get people into the stadium and prove his team is worth picking up. So he does a bunch of silly antics to pull in a crowd. That pretty much sums up the movie. Doesn't sound worth watching, but Will Ferrell always makes movies like that. Remember Elf? Freaking hilarious. So yeah. Worth getting.

- Xtoph

The Sasquatch Gang - DVD - Angled Doors Review

 Also known as The Sasquatch Dumpling Gang. This flick was made by the same people that made Napoleon Dynamite. You can tell... all the characters act just like the people in Napoleon. It's nuts. The guy from Jeepers Creepers is gonna lose his car, so he fakes Bigfoot footprints... and a Bigfoot turd, so he can sell things on the net to make some money. That's the basic plot, but not really at all what this movie is about. If you liked Napoleon you'll dig this one too. Josh Heder has a cameo too.

- Xtoph

Plastic Man: Rubber Bandits Vol. 2 - TPB - Angled Doors Review

 Kyle Baker brings us this series of crazy antics that would only come from Plastic Man. Dude is wacked. Basically, The Time Trapper is messing around with time and some lady busts in on Plas' and his girlfriend claiming to be his wife and has a shapeshifting kid. The DC continuity is getting all messed up and some how President Lincoln ends up in the picture. He ends up being Booth disguised as Lincoln. They take Booth back in time to kill Lincoln to save the future that hasn't happened. Booth dies. Plas' and Woozy decide they have to kill Lincoln themselves. More craziness. It's just non-stop. Later on, a vampire story. This book is out there, but a lot of fun.

- Xtoph

Munchies - DVD - Angled Doors Review

 Munchies is another classic 80's horror/comedy no one should miss. This is the b-movie Gremlins wanna-be. Charlie Stratton (Summer Camp Nightmare), who looks a lot like Fright Night's William Ragsdale, and his father find a creature they think is an alien. They take it home and it gets kidnapped by the films villain (Harvey Korman, Caroll Burnett show and 5 million other things). The thing multiplies (Gremlins?) and Charlie and his girlfriend (Nadine Ven der Velde from Critters) chase them around the rest of the movie with hilarious b-movie antics abound. They even go so far as to have a scene where someone is looking at a National Enquirer type rag with "Gremlin?" as the headline followed by the Munchies speeding down the street in their stolen car... which happens to be a Gremlin.

- Xtoph

Lost Boys 2: The Tribe - DVD - Angled Doors Review

 If your looking for a direct sequel to the original Lost Boys, this isn't it. It picks up many years later in a new town with some annoying surfer vamps. Cool cameo in the beginning with Tom Savini though. About half an hour into the movie we finally get introduced to Edgar Frog (Corey Feldman) , the only returning character. What happened to his brother? It only hints at first. (In the bonus features we find out he's a vamp) It's basically the same old story. Kids move to new town, hang out with vamps and get turned. Try to fight it and kill the head vampire so they can be normal again. Edgar comes in shows them some comics and saves the day. The real story that we wanted to see starts at the end. Sam (Corey Haim) returns and he's a vamp. Him and Edgar battle it out... but we only get to see the very beginning of the fight, then it's more credits. Can't wait for part three!

- Xtoph

Kenny & Co. - DVD - Angled Doors Review

 Classic film about childhood. It's a good fun family film by director Don Coscarelli. (Phantasm) This is a fun movie dealing with a lot of things. If you grew up in the 70's or 80's this will have you heading on a trip of nostalgia. Most of the cast from Phantasm was also in this film. It was the Halloween night segment of the movie that made Coscarelli decide he wanted to do a horror film.

- Xtoph

Howard The Duck: Media Duckling - TPB - Angled Doors Review

 The downside to this is it's not by Steve Gerber. It's still an enjoyable read though. Collecting the latest 4-issue series of Howard The Duck. Taking a stab at the media and reality tee-vee. If you love Howard, this is for you. If you hate the media, this is for you. If you got money burning a hole in your pocket, then this is for you. Go buy it now.

- Xtoph

Harold and Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay - DVD - Angled Doors Review

 Harold & Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay picks up where the original (Go to White Castle) left off. Harold decides he can't wait the ten days for the love of his life to get back from Amsterdam, so they pack up and head off to the airport. Kumar sneaks weed onto the plane gets mistaken for a terrorist (they think his bong is a bomb) and that's when the adventure begins. This time around they get shipped off to a prison, escape and deal with inbred rednecks, Ku Klux Klan and more as they are on the run. I don't want to give any of it away, but there are plenty of laughs to go around from start to finish.

- Xtoph

Comic Book The Movie - DVD - Angled Doors Review

 This is a mockumentary about a comic book that is being turned into a movie. Mark Hamill stars and directs. It's a fun little indie film that takes a look at the comic book culture and takes place at a comic-con. There are lots of cool cameos and interviews by the likes of Hugh Hefner, Stan Lee, Kevin Smith, Bruce Campbell and many more. There are a lot of very cool bonus features to check out too... "Behind The Voices" featurette that has a lot of the people who do some of the coolest cartoon character voices. Extended interviews with Bruce Campbell and Kevin Smith. Deleted Scenes, Bloopers and more. Comic fans and cartoon fans should definitely check this out.

- Xtoph

Boy Eats Girl - DVD - Angled Doors Review

 When I first saw this video cover at the store I was completely turned off. Not another crappy zombie horror/comedy flick. I finally gave in and watched it and was pleasantly surprised. Although they did not stray from familiar territory it was actually a good film. It looked nice and professional. The actors were believable when they delivered their lines. There was a bit of substance to the plot. I've just been forced a lot of crap lately, especially in the zombie sub-genre. All in all this is a good movie though. One I'd watch again.

- Xtoph

National Lampoon's Bagboy - DVD - Angled Doors Review

 National Lampoon movies seem to be out every other week now. No longer are the days when you were guaranteed a laughfest when you see the logo on the box. I still find myself guilty picking one up from the rental store every few visits hopeing for some good mindless entertainment. Bagboy delivers. Filled with the sheer stupidity you expect form a National Lampoon film, but also delivered with an actual story. One you enjoy watching and waiting to see what happens next. Revolving around grocery store bagging competitions, a has-been bagger is coaching a new young bagger. Sounds lame... but it's actually pretty cool.

- Xtoph

Eating Raoul ( 1982 ) Netflix Review

Starring:  Paul Bartel, Mary Woronov, Robert Beltran, & Susan Saiger

Directed By Paul Bartel

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0083869/


     Lately I have found myself watching older movies.  Maybe it's because everything nowadays seems too contrived, or has already been done.  Being a reviewer for only 2 years has taught me a lot.  One thing in particular, is the ability to give almost ANY movie a chance.  I personally feel that unless you give something a chance, then who the fuck are you to bag on it?  Twilight, The Social Network, and other countless movies today have really left me no choice but to retreat into some older, lesser known movies, and this very movie is a prime example of a good find.

     I was totally shocked that eating Raoul hasn't been talked about more than it is.  Just by reading the Netflix description got me interested.  I also noticed that it didn't get a lot of stars or thumbs up, but something about the title and brief description tugged at attention.  I was disappointed.  Watching Eating Raoul made me laugh, and shake my head at the rating all at the same time.  I understand now that even as early as 82, almost ANYTHING sexual would get you and R rating, and Eating Raoul is another example of a bad rating for a good film.

     As if if living in Hollywood wasn't enough, imagine trying to save money to live out your dreams, while a swarm of Swingers try to constantly seduce you and your loved one.  Paul Bartel wrote/directed/starred in this little indie classic.  Paul and Mary bland dream of the day when they can own/run a restaurant far away from the scum of Hollywood.  Paul can't seem to keep a job, but has an impressive collection of rare wines to keep him happy, and his loving wife Mary is a nutritionist at a local hospital.

     Finally, the day comes when an Realtor has such a place for the Blands to acquire, but it doesn't come cheap.  $20,000 will get it for them.  Paul and Mary then try almost every idea imaginable, and often met with scumbags who want sex for favors.  As if this wasn't enough stress, their apartment complex seems to be over run with sex crazed swingers who seem to just walk into the Blands home whenever.  After one such swinger dies, the two take his money, then dispose of the body.  Getting an Idea, the Blands decide to run an ad in the local underground rag advertising whatever sexual fantasy you can think of.  Once the clients show up, Mary seduces them until Paul can hit them over the head, killing them, and then take the cash.

     All goes good until the Blands decide to take advantage of a locksmith named Raoul and his locks.  Unbeknownst to the Blands is the truth about Raoul.  He's a semi-professional thief.  One night after the Blands take down a few clients, Raoul breaks in, gets caught, and the 3 decide to work out a deal that will ultimately leave everybody with A LOT of money.  As is with everything, snags to come up and that's only the beginning.  From that point on it's a constant whirl of sexual perverts getting offed for cash at a rapid rate.

     I really liked this movie for a number of reasons.  Really funny, and easy to watch with almost anybody.  I especially thought it was funny that whenever somebody died there was absolutely no blood anywhere.  Not on the frying pan, knife, or anything else the couple and Raoul seemed to use.  The only reason this movie got an R rating was because of the sexuality, but even that didn't warrant the rating it got.  The second thing I really enjoyed was the pace of the film.  At times it kind drawn on especially when Raoul was trying to seduce Mary, but it quickly bounced back.

     For all of the eye rolling moments and laughs, Eating Raoul was a very pleasant movie to watch and should be viewed.

-Mr. What?- ( * * * )

Suck ( 2009 ) Netflix Review

Starring:  Rob Stefaniuk, Jessica Paré, Paul Anthony, Mike Lobel, Chris Ratz, Alice Cooper, Moby, Henry Rollins, Iggy Pop & Malcolm McDowell

Directed By Rob Stefaniuk

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1323605/


     Indifference can be a total bitch.  I've often said this about a lot of things, but none more than movies.  I really hate getting pumped up over a preview, and then feel so so about the actual movie once i saw it.  Suck is a perfect example of that.  I really thought this movie would have more balls to it considering the cast, but not so.  Maybe if there were a second chance at this, or maybe a re-imagining in say, 3 years, then it would be worth owning.

     Not to say that Suck wasn't funny ( which it was in spots ) or that the makeup was decent ( which it was ) or hell, even the fact that some of the influential heads of Rock/Punk made decent appearances, it was just the story that kind of left me flat. We've seen this format with Queen Of The Damned and Jennifer's Body, and by no means is Suck anything to put in a top 10 list, but at least it tried to be different in a familiar setting.

     The story is pretty simple.  A band at the end of their rope is willing to do anything to be famous, even if it means becoming Vampires.  That's where the Jennifer's Body Reff. comes in a bit.  Though, in JB the band sacrificed Jennifer in attempt to be famous.  It also didn't help that central protagonist of Suck was named Jennifer either.  But I will give this Jennifer ( Jessica Paré ) the nod to better acting and selling the woes of being a Vampire in Goth band, better than Megan Fox did with Her possessed Jennifer.

     I will say that the Cameos made this movie a little more watchable.  Moby as a rock frontman named Beef was funny in itself considering how Moby is.  The rest of the cast wasn't bad either, but at times this movie just lost steam and failed to deliver a better product.  Oh well, at least it's a vampire film without anybody sparkling around a Forrest.

-Mr. What?-

Black Dynamite ( 2009 ) Netflix Review

Starring: Michael Jai White, Obba Babatundé, Tommy Davidson, Arsenio Hall, Byron Minns, Cedric Yarbrough, & Miguel A. Núñez Jr.

Directed By Scott Sanders

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1190536/


     8 months ago I saw a preview for Black Dynamite and lost it.  I didn't know if it was a joke trailer on Youtube, or an actual movie.  I researched it and found out that it was an actual movie, with an actual cast.  To my surprise though, the movie was really funny and at the same time an homage to early Blaxpoitation films of the 70's.  After 3 to 4 screenings I still find new stuff to laugh at or back up the scene to catch something I missed.

     Black Dynamite is the story of an ex CIA/Kung Fu Master/Pimp/total badass who is trying to clean up the streets.  Early on Dynamites brother is gunned down, and BD must find his brothers killer.  As if that's not enough, the local orphanage is being flooded with Heroin, the streets are a chaotic mess, and a new malt liquor called Anaconda is being introduced to the streets with a very nasty side effect.

     The real sealer for me was the extra stuff added to make this seem like an actual Blaxpoitation film.  The grain of the original 70's low budget films is here on dislpay. Also the bad acting and chessy fighting scenes are here too.  Seeing a character take a hit off of an unlit cigarette and cough, watching another character named bullhorn slap an extra ( on accident ) and almost get punched himself, & Black Dynamite try to get serious only to have the boom mic pop into the shot are only a taste of the goodies in store for you the viewer.

      If you liked Dolemite or Coffy then you will love this movie.

-Mr. What?- ( * * * * )

Shakes The Clown ( 1991 ) Netflix Review

Starring: Bobcat Goldthwait, Julie Brown, Kathy Griffin, Adam Sandler, Blake Clark & Tom Kenny

Directed By Bobcat Goldthwait

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102898/


     There was a time when you could see a cheesy/raunchy comedy that wouldn't offend too much, while still feeling you were "Alternative".  1991 was a huge year for issues.  Rodney King, The Gulf War, Mike Tyson & the arrest, The Discovery of Jeffery Dahmer and his "Hobby", & the collapse of the Soviet Union.  1991 was also a decent year for movies.  Terminator 2: Judgment Day, The Silence Of The Lambs, & Robin Hood: Prince Of Thieves all came out and did well with audiences.

     By that same measure though, there were other movies that came out not so......well.  Cold As Ice, King Ralph, The Rocketeer, The Super, & Nothing But Trouble.  In the middle of all of the Hollywood Bullshit and big releases, there was the the middle ground.  The ones who almost always go and see movies that critics like, but don't make as much as the bigger releases. That year had some movie just like that.  Naked Lunch, The People Under The Stairs, My Own Private Idaho, & Dead Again.

     Among all of those movies one stood out as almost a total outcast.  Shakes The Clown is really nothing more than a cheap-o movie filmed with a decent cast.  To see Adam Sandler dressed as a clown, beating up mimes is awesome. Robin Williams  makes a hilarious cameo as mime instructor, Julie Brown plays an annoying but lovable girlfriend to Goldthwait's character Shakes, and Tom Kenny ( Spongebob and Chowder ) killed the role as Binky The Clown.

     The story revolves around Shakes the drunken party clown.  Shakes ( Goldthwait ) plods through his job with drunken ease, and little concern.  With his buddies Stenchy ( Clark ) and Dink ( Sandler ), shakes goes through the motion of boozing up, doing parties, and beating up mimes.  His girlfriend Judy ( Brown ) want more out of life than her current occupation, and for shakes to sober up.  One day it is announced that Binky ( Kenny ) will be the successor to a kids show, and not shakes.  That news puts shakes into a deeper depression.  As if that's not enough, Shakes gets framed for his boss's murder.

     All of this wrapped into a little foul mouthed package for you to laugh at.  I really enjoyed the heart of this movie, and was reminded of the early 90's and kinda free cinema.  A few years later True Romance would come out and really set the bar for violent films.  Shakes The Clown would fare pretty well by today's crowd.  Hell, I'm more surprised that the self proclaimed "Juggalos" of the world don't have this movie listed as one of their favorites.

     If you want a good time and some good laughs at the expense of a low budget movie, then this would be a perfect match.  Extra Kudos to Bobcat Goldthwait for being the writer and director at the same time.  Just too bad his career didn't fetch him more that his current standing.

-Mr. What?- ( * * * )